Redtree Times

It has bothered me all my life that I do not paint like everybody else.

–Henri Matisse

Well, Mr. Matisse certainly did not paint like everybody else and I, for one, am glad of it.

But I believe I know what he is saying. As an artist, you’re always torn between two poles of confidence, the high and the low.

When it is at its highest point, you believe so strongly in what you are doing that it doesn’t matter what everybody else’s work is like.

But at the low points, you lose confidence in the credibility of your own voice and vision. At these low points it seems like it would be easier to have the comfort of being able to judge your own work against others who do the same type of work so that you could gauge whether your creations were worthy of notice.

I certainly have swung wildly between these two poles and have at points wished that I painted more like other artists, as though I would somehow benefit from their credibility. I know that this sort of thinking is misplaced and the result of low self-esteem in that moment, but it happens.

And on a more regular basis than one might think.

But the work itself is usually the voice of reason, the thing that brings me around once more. Just getting lost in the creation of a piece and sitting in front of it in the aftermath, still fully immersed in the life force it then exudes, washes away that need to be like everybody else.

But even in that moment, I know that nagging feeling and the desire to be like everybody else will still be there waiting for me when I inevitably swing back to the low side.

So, Mr. Matisse, thank you for not being like everybody else. I know how hard it sometimes must have felt but we appreciate you staying true to your own voice.

I apologize for replaying another blogpost again this morning. I am again tight on time and instead of not sharing anything and since I liked sharing the work of those other artists yesterday, I thought I’d share a post that ran (as a replay) three years back that feature a selection of Matisse’s interior scenes, which I very much admire.

Plus, I strongly identify with Matisse’s words here. When I am at a low ebb of confidence, which happens more than I would like, I wonder if should try to paint more like everybody else. Or even paint at all. Fortunately, I’ve done this long enough that there is almost a script for this situation by now, one where I tell myself that in these moments of doubt, I am failing to recognize that it is the fact that not being like everybody else is actually the strength of most artists.

Fresh material tomorrow. Promise.

Now let’s listen to the Kinks. They know what I’m talking about.