It has bothered me all my life that I do not paint like everybody else.
–Henri Matisse
Well, Mr. Matisse certainly did not paint like everybody else and I, for one, am glad of it.
But I believe I know what he is saying. As an artist, you’re always torn between poles of confidence.
When it is at its highest point, you believe so strongly in what you are doing that it doesn’t matter what everybody else’s work is like.
But at the low points, you lose confidence in the credibility of your own voice and vision. At these low points it seems like it would be easier to have the comfort of being able to judge your own work against others who do the same type of work so that you could gauge whether your creations were worthy of notice.
I certainly have swung wildly between these two poles and have at points wished that I painted more like other artists, as though I would somehow benefit from their credibility. I know that this sort of thinking is misplaced and the result of low self-esteem in that moment, but it happens. And on a more regular basis than one might think.
But the work itself is usually the voice of reason, the thing that brings me around once more. Just getting lost in the creation of a piece and sitting in front of it in the aftermath, still fully immersed in the life force it then exudes, washes away that need to be like everybody else.
But even in that moment, I know that nagging feeling, that desire to be like everybody else, will still be there waiting for me when I inevitably swing back to that other pole.
So, Mr. Matisse, thank you for not being like everybody else. I know how hard it sometimes must have felt but we appreciate you staying true to your own voice.
I am not in the studio this morning and decided to replay the post above from a few years back. Since it’s Sunday morning, I added a piece of music that somewhat echoes Mr. Matisse’s message at the top. This is an early (and favorite) song from The Kinks called I’m Not Like Everybody Else.
And below the video are a few more of Mr. Matisse’s interiors, a group of work that I really enjoy.
Art should be about self-expression, and if artists understand that, then, it wouldn’t matter, if what they paint is pleasing to others, but, as artists, we all have the consideration of making a living too, that’s why, we’re, often, torn.