Zenith
Man, if he compare himself with all that he can see, is at the zenith of power; but if he compare himself with all that he can conceive, he is at the nadir of weakness.
–Charles Caleb Colton, Remarks on the Talents of Lord Byron and the Tendencies of Don Juan, 1823
Woke up late and tired this morning so I am replaying a post from just a few years back. The painting is a large one that sits in my sightline here in the studio, one I always felt was underappreciated in its short time out of the studio. But it speaks to me. Maybe for the words at the top and those below. I don’t know for sure. Maybe it says something to me that I can’t articulate. It wouldn’t be the first time.
I’ve been really dragging in recent days. Last week I was two weeks out from the end of my course of radiation and was beginning to feel pretty good finally after some rough days. I made the mistake of thinking I was past the effects. Since I was doing well in taking several short walks a day at an ever-increasing but still slower pace, I thought it might be okay to attempt a short session on the old exercise machine, a sort of combo rowing/bicycle contraption that has been very effective for me.
Big mistake. After a brief ten-minute session at an easy pace in both the morning and afternoon, I found myself in agony the following day. It was not anything like the achiness that comes with working out after some time off. I know that feeling well and this was well beyond that. It was like full body inflammation. Every part of my body hurt.
This pain hung around for the several days and even today, though I don’t hurt, my fatigue is on me like a monkey on a cupcake. Sorry, I had to throw that phrase in. I discovered that when my doctors told me to take it easy, they meant very easy. It turns out their definition was not the same as mine and therein lies the problem.
It felt like I kicked my recovery backwards a couple of weeks, something I certainly was trying to avoid.
I will be taking it easy according to their definition, not mine, for the next couple of weeks with the hope to soon be back to whatever the new normal turns out to be. Here’s that post from a few years back.
I came across aphorism above from Chares Caleb Colton and it got me thinking. Not that it is pertinent to my thoughts here, but Colton (1780-1832) was one of those interesting British eccentrics of the 19th century. He was a cleric, a writer, an art gallerist, a high-stakes gambler, and a wine collector.
His words at the top made me think about how we perceive our own strengths and weaknesses. How much power do we really have? Is our strength as mighty as we sometimes perceive it, especially when we often only see as far as the wall of the bubble in which we exist?
Probably not.
If we extend our realm beyond our bubble of familiarity, we often discover our true significance. Or should I say, insignificance.
I guess it’s just another way of putting the big fish in a little pond versus a small fish in a big pond thing. Except I believe we need to have the experience of both. We need to feel strong and powerful in some way just to know that we are necessary. But at the same time, we need to recognize our limitations and smallness in the greater scheme of things.
It’s that balancing of these two worlds, our little and big ponds, that we really need. We need to feel big and small at once. Proud and humble in equal amounts.
Whoa, Nellie! Have to pull on the reins and bring this old horse to a stop. I started this without any real thought as to where it was going and now I am afraid my original riff is at peril of running wild.
I want to get off right here before I get too far from where I’d hoped I’d end up which was in pointing out that our power and weakness is at the mercy of the amount of love we produce, give, and receive in our worlds, be they little or big ponds.
Love is the zenith of all power.
I guess I should have just written that.
Oh, well. That’s what you get when you read someone else’s journals– ramblings, half-baked thoughts and half-witticisms from a sometime half-wit.
Let’s end today with a favorite song, Love Reign O’er Me, from Quadrophenia from The Who.
Pretty powerful stuff. Zenith-level.
Redtree Times 