This is an early Red Tree painting from back in 2001 that is titled Challenger that lives with me now here in the studio. It’s one of a small group of pieces that made the rounds through the galleries over the years yet never found a home. I call them orphans. This particular orphan spent a much longer time in the galleries than most, only coming back to me a couple of years ago. It drew interest a number of times yet never made that final connection.
These pieces always intrigue me. There must be something that can be learned from them or at least that is what my mind tells me. So I find myself going back again and again to look at these pieces, trying to determine what might be lacking in them. Or at least pinpointing a reason why they never fully connected.
With some it’s an easy task. The flaws or weaknesses are obvious and far overshadow the strengths. In fact, I am pleased that they are with me and not hanging on a wall somewhere. Thankfully, there aren’t a huge number of those, which I won’t be showing here anytime soon. and will no doubt ever see a gallery wall again.
Some are with me for external reasons like poor presentation– the frame being too wide, too small or an ugly color that fights against the work. Some are just too big which limited their time on the walls of most galleries which meant they had fewer opportunities to be seen than other smaller paintings. Some are the last pieces of a series that I no longer work in and don’t really fit in with the pieces of current shows. Many of these pieces will emerge at some time in the future when the time is right.
But there are a couple, like the painting above, that fall in the middle. I see strengths in them but I see weaknesses as well. This particular painting is a little big 18″ by 42″ which made it a bit more expensive and harder to place. It is oil on a wood panel with a slightly textured gessoed surface which was not unusual for me at the time it was painted but gives it a slightly different look than my typical work which consists of acrylic paints and inks. This dates it a bit. Plus the effects of my handling of oils are quite different than my handling of acrylics, as is the the overall color to a degree.
Looking at it, there are things in it that I would do differently now. Colors that would be changes just a bit, perhaps made a bit more complex with the addition of another tint. But at the time it was created it represented who I was and what I was doing as an artist so I can’t question it. Nor do I want to change it now.
It is what it is. It feels complete and of a time.
So I now look at it in that way and accept it as it is. I find myself overlooking the small downside and appreciating the essence of the painting without my own bias. And I like it. It’s like looking at an old picture of yourself and accepting that it is a past you, a version that you have long transcended. Despite that, it is still you at its core and that is the part that try to see.
So, this orphan may live with me for a long time but that’s okay by me. It reminds me who I once was.
I wonder if it’s the title. When I read “Challenger,” the first thing I thought of was the explosion, and the sky in your painting seemed to represent the chaos of that terrible day. Honestly, it made me uncomfortable, unwilling to ponder it longer.
You’re no doubt correct. I’ve lived with this painting for so long that I discounted the thought process behind the title. Yes, it does refer to the Challenger tragedy and my personal memories of that day.
I owned a business at the time and was in the midst of our busy season but because of a bout of food poisoning was home that day. It was beautiful day and I watched it live while laying on our couch, feverish and experiencing terrible stomach cramping. Fading in and out of consciousness to see the horror of that day was nightmarish.
However, it illuminated for me the immense bravery and faith of the astronauts. They rose to a challenge and sacrificed all for something they saw as being greater than our small world. I saw this at the time as a memory of the Challenger astronauts and a tribute to their courage.
However, your reaction to being reminded of that day may very well account for the fact it never found a home. It is perfectly understandable and I definitely overlooked that.
Dear Gary,
I’m always amazed how you can analyze one of your own paintings and make a life and an artist lesson out of it! That in itself is an amazing talent. I don’t know why that painting is an orphan because it looks beautiful to me with all kinds of meanings. It is interesting that you named it Challenger, that in itself says a lot. I’m glad this orphan has a special place in your heart.
Thanks, Jackie. There is another comment and my reply on this post that I hope you’ll read. It points out the obvious meaning and backstory I omitted in the post.
GOOD Evening. What is the date of your Erie visit at Kada Gallery ? What is the cost on this wandering orphan ? I have always thought it was beautiful and would be a perfect logo for a company that specialized in searching families heritage.
Hello– Thanks for the kind words. My show this year at the Kada Gallery in Erie falls on October 22. I will send you the other details via email.
[…] My memory is fading, obviously. I actually did write about this painting before, back in 2016. However, that post focused on the piece’s strengths and weaknesses and […]