I spent yesterday working on a piece that was based on the photo from yesterday’s blogpost, one from Paul Strand that featured tiny figures on a sidewalk in a park. I had translated the composition immediately and could see what I wanted in my head but just could not get it to translate on paper. It was frustrating and had me flummoxed for most of the afternoon. I just could not get to the image in my mind, could not achieve the depth and feel that I was seeing.
I wanted to taste a hearty stew but was only getting weak broth.
I think that it came down to the fact that I had not completely absorbed the composition, had not fully made the transition from the original inspiration to a point where it became my own. Like learning a piece of music where you are trying to discover the flow and rhythm of it, trying to see the pattern laid down by the original composer before you impose your own interpretation on it. Making their notes your notes.
This is normally not a a problem for me. The way I paint allows immediate transition into my own hand normally. But sometimes when I try to force my work into a pattern that is not mine and is not fully hashed out, the results are less than stellar.
The piece at the top is not an example of this. Rather, this is a the opposite, even though it may not resemble my normal work. From 8 or 9 years ago, this started as an exercise where I was just getting back to colors that I strayed from had , each little sliver being combinations of color. Slowly, it evolved into this fish-like swirl. I find myself drawn into the pattern and movement of this and it works for me because it feels pure, feels as though it is my own rhythm and flow even though it doesn’t resemble my typical work.
I don’t know how to put this coherently. It just feels natural, like writing your own signature. I’ve down a couple of these over the years and they are among my favorites, probably because of this. When I compare the easiness and grace of this piece to yesterday’s effort, there is a world of difference. In this piece I am signing my own name whereas yesterday I was trying to forge a signature. But if I can ever get to that image in my mind that changes and my signature begins to appear.