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Archive for December, 2009

Mystery Solved

I was up early this morning and as I walked to the studio in the cold darkness, my eyes drifted up to the clear sky above where the stars were sharp and glinting.  I thought about the mystery of the spiral light that flashed across the skies of Norway this past week, causing much alarm and speculation.

Mystery solved.

Turns out it was a Russian intercontinental missile test over the White Sea that was fired from a submarine.  The spiral of the light was caused by a failure of one of the rocket’s stages.

UFO believers were a little disappointed and, once again, suspicious.  There’s a conspiracy lurking in every event for those guys.

The whole thing made me wonder about our fascination with UFOs and alien life forms.  Does the desire to believe in such things as UFOs mimic in some way  religion and our need to believe that there is more than our temporal life on Earth?  Are these people searching the skies responding in the same way as someone searching their religious texts?

Both want answers.  Both want to believe that we are not alone in our existence here, that there is life beyond.  Both are often stubbornly entrenched in their beliefs even when faced with positive evidence that contradicts them.

Are UFO believers simply people who are disenfranchised from conventional religion yet still seek answers to the mysteries of life, turning outward to the cosmos instead of looking inward?

Like most questions that come to me at 5:30 in the morning, I have no answers.  Just wondering.  Unlike the Norwegian lights, this is a mystery that will not be solved anytime soon…

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Now that we’re in the Christmas season, I’ve been thinking about some of my favorite gifts I’ve received over my life.  There have been many that have had special meaning such as the typewriter, that I wrote of earlier, that was a gift from my parents in order to foster my writing ambitions as a teen.  Most are gone now but some still live with me.  This is one that does.

My sister, Linda, gave this to me many, many moons ago when I was 12 or 13 years old.  It’s a simple carving of  what is probably meant to be Don Quixote.  It doesn’t matter- it’s always been Don Quixote to me.

It’s not finely carved, probably made by a guy in some tropical foreign land where he knocks out 20 of these a day to earn a meager living.  Doesn’t matter.  To me, it’s a Rodin.  I’ve carried it with me through ups and downs and the wear shows on it.  A nick from his hat and a scratch here and there.  It broke in two at his ankles and needed mending just to continue standing.

And he does.

I view him as an inspirational icon, a constant reminder to dream beyond what is in front of you, to believe that you can exceed what others think is possible for you.  That you can be whatever you dream yourself to be.

To tilt at your own windmills.

And to remember that others believe in you.

Simple things and small gestures can have great effect.

Many belated thanks, Linda…

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We’re into the Christmas season and the airwaves are filled with Christmas specials.  There are the venerable classics such as A Charlie Brown Christmas, How the Grinch Stole Christmas and Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer alongside newer offerings featuring Shrek and other contemporary animated figures.  Some come and go, shown only for a short time.  Perhaps not timeless enough or just victims to ratings.

The specials you never see today are the variety show Christmas specials from the past featuring stars like Andy Williams, Sonny and Cher, the Osmonds and of course, Bing Crosby.  They were goofy contrivances with lots of fake snow and blazing fireplaces on studio sets with terrible jokes and a lot of forced, saccharine  sentimentality.

But I always liked the Bing Crosby Christmas shows.  They weren’t quite as schlocky as the others and you had Bing’s beautiful voice on several holiday classics throughout.  One classic moment came when a young David Bowie appeared on Bing’s last special in 1977, filmed a month before his death.  The show’s producers wanted him to sing The Little Drummer Boy with Bing but Bowie was not a fan of the song and refused.  With the cameras waiting, a new song, Peace on Earth, was written and woven into the other song.  The finished product was done with less than an hour of rehearsal and remains a perennial holiday favorite on radio playlists everywhere.

It’s a great duet and stands up well.  It’s moments like this that make me miss those old specials…

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I’ve been doing some genealogy lately.  Don’t worry- I won’t bore you with all the details of my family.  Nobody wants to read that.

But doing so raises the question of why I’m doing this.  What is the purpose in looking back?

Growing up, there was never a sense of history in our families.  It felt as though our family lines had started one or two generations before, little known before the lives of our grandparents.  Hardly anything in the way of familial knowledge was passed down, either in words or objects.  It gave a feeling of being disconnected from the rest of the world.   It left me wondering if the place we occupied in life at the moment was always this same niche.  How did we arrive at this point?

For example, there’s a side in my family that seems like a hopeless lot.  Barely educated with many being illiterate.  Poor.  Prone to violence and crime.  The only stories I heard about this side of my family were lurid accounts of fights breaking out at funerals where the casket ends up overturned and guys kicking out the screens of their televisions while watching professional wrestling.  There were other stories that were worse than that but I’ll keep them to myself, thank you.

The point is, how did they get to this low level?  Were they always like this?  Were they always stupid?  Were they always fighting themselves at the bottom?

When you’re trying to figure out who you are and you see that half of your past is less than inspiring, you begin to wonder.

So I begin to dig, putting together a fragile puzzle with bits and pieces spread all over the place.  I use all the online resources I know of to gain  bits and pieces of info.  There’s hardly any movement then, with a single piece of found information, there’s a landslide of information and the pattern of this family seems to be uncovered.  Their place in the web of the world is there to be seen, not hidden anymore under layers of ignorance and shame.

I felt like an orphan discovering the name of his parents, feeling connected with a knowable history.

And for this side of my family, it was truly enlightening to view their line.  They seemed to be the products of nothing but ignorance at this point but it was not always the case.  Their decline was many, many generations in the making.  They had been religious scholars and among the wealthy merchant class of northern Europe going back to the mid-1500’s.  Recruited by William Penn and coming to America they had been among the first settlers of Philadelphia. They fought with Washington at Valley Forge.  They moved westward, forming some of the earliest frontier settlements in Virginia and beyond.

But as they went, there was a serious erosion of the value they placed on knowledge and learning as evidenced by the numbers of them who were marked down in censuses of the 1800’s as being unable to read or write.  While their family line had once been at the forefront of the great movement west as leaders and landowners, they gradually settled into a life as tenants and farm laborers.  Each generation bringing them closer and closer to the version of this family that I now know.

So what’s the purpose of this whole exercise?  I don’t really know for sure.  For me, it’s finding that my family was an active part of the American past, that there is a foundation down there under the rubble.  It’s a newly found pride in a name that I didn’t want to claim as part of me.  It’s knowing that a positive contribution to the formation of this country has been made and that this line of the family is a real part of the American experience.

It also points out the value of knowledge and education in the survival of a family.

And a country…

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Revving Up

It’s a slow, cool Monday and I’m still trying to get my bearings.  I’m getting ready to get back to painting in the near future with some determination.  I have some ideas, some thoughts on what I want to see and feel on the surfaces.  A building excitement.

I try to to let this excitement grow to a point where I am rearing to get back at it.  It’s a little like those toy cars that have dynamos that you rev up by moving it back and forth on the ground then let go and the car dashes off on its own.  That’s how it usually works for me.  I build the excitement then let it go and hope it fires ahead on its own volition.

So excuse me, I have some revving up to tend to…

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A Time to Return

Well, winter has finally found its way to my little corner of the world.  Yesterday, a little snow fell and the temperatures plunged a bit, making it feel more like this time of the year should.   I’ve been spending a lot of time examining the past lately, something that I truly enjoy, so I thought on this cold Sunday morning with snow on the ground I would take a short break and listen to some music.

I thought this would be a fitting choice for someone who is looking back.  It’s Ryan Adams and his song Oh My Sweet Carolina.  This is a delicate acoustic version that I hope you’ll enjoy…

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Sometimes when you think about what you might write down on a list of your favorite movies there are some that evade your memory until you see it again and, like a desert flower, blooms again in your mind.

Such is the case with 84 Charing Cross Road.

It was on TCM last night and we flipped it on just to glimpse a few moments and ended up watching the whole thing.  I was immediately reminded of how much I like the film.

From 1987, it’s a movie about books and the written letter.  Hardly an action-filled two hours.  It’s the true story of writer Helene Hanff and her 20 year correspondence with a London bookshop, Marks and Co., located at 84 Charing Cross Road.  In 1949, Hanff an aspiring and struggling NY playwright responded a small classified ad from the bookseller.  She was seeking obscure British literature and was unable to locate her desired works in shops.  The movie follows the correspondence between Hanff over the next 20 years with the staff of the shop and how they effected each other’s lives with small acts of kindness and humor.  Hanff never made the trip to London until after the manager she primarily corresponded with had died and the shop had closed.

It’s a small quiet film that celebrates two things that are racing to obscurity- books and the posted letter.  Just a lovely and charming film.

The great Anne Bancroft stars in the film as Hanff and as usual, is wonderful.  I have had a longtime crush on Anne Bancroft to the point that when I think of Mel Brooks I don’t think of his great movies but instead find myself thinking what a lucky bastard he was to have married Anne Bancroft.   It also stars Anthony Hopkins as Frank Doel, the main man at the bookshop and Judi Dench as his wife.

If you love the feel of an old book and still get excited when you receive a hand-written note,  you most likely will enjoy this film.  It remains one of my sometimes forgotten favorites.

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A number of years ago, while wandering around the National Mall in Washington, DC, Cheri and I stumbled across this older memorial just off  to the side.  There was nobody there and it was a nice respite from the crowds.  We had no idea what it was, having never seen it in any literature, but deduced it was a World War I memorial from the inscription across its crown.

It was very rundown.  The marble was severely stained and appeared to be in disrepair.  The foliage around it was untrimmed and though there was a lovely peacefulness there befitting a memorial to brave warriors, it was a sad sight.  We walked on to other, more well known monuments.

Today there is one surviving soldier from World War I, Frank Buckles.  One last witness to the war that was the first to earn the moniker of world war.  Horrible enough to be called The Great War.  The war to end all wars. Over 115,000 of our soldiers died from 1917-1918.  To put that into perspective, around 4000 of our troops have perished in Iraq and Afghanistan.

It was a war that changed the world.

And our national memorial to it sits unattended and passed by.  A great shame and testimony to the shortness of our collective memory.  Frank Buckles is the honorary chairman of the World War I Memorial Foundation which is trying to raise funds to renovate the monument and bring it to the attention of the public.  It’s a worthy effort for the old soldier.

My hope is that other soldiers from later wars will recognize the need for stepping forward to champion this cause.  If the memory of the blood and sacrifice of the 115,000 Americans killed in that war can be lost after a mere 90 years, their own efforts and self-sacrifice may soon go the same route and be forgotten as well.

And that would be a great shame.

So take a look at their site and if you’re in DC  stop in and honor the fallen of the First World War.

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The ancient Mayans may be saying that the world will soon end but it’s not a new concept.  Many people throughout time have foresaw the end of the world through the signs they read in the pattern of their society’s breakdown.  You can read it throughout history.  Men of the day, from ancient Greece onward, decrying the breakdown of their civilization and the imminent demise of the world.

I’ve written a bit about the items I’ve been reading in the old newspapers while doing some research on my grandfather.  At first I was charmed by the vivid nature of the time.  Explosive growth and innovation in so many fields.  Seemingly unlimited potential for those willing to go for it.

But as I scanned through the pages, it became a nightmare world.  Every day brought new horrors.  The local pages were filled with the deaths of so many, young and old, from things that have been tamed by modern science for so long that we no longer give them a second thought unless we’re in a third world nation.  Dysentery, cholera and malaria.  Tuberculosis.

Rabies.  Yes, rabies, for chrissakes.

There were several accounts in the papers from the short time at which I was looking, in which local citizens died from rabies.  In one case the man was placed in a padded cell and was near death, according to the account.

People were hit by trains on the city streets on a regular basis.  Multiple accounts of farming accidents, most in graphic details that you would never see in today’s papers.  Plenty of murders.  There were only a handful of cars on the roads around 1905 but there were plenty of reports of accidents, many fatal.

And fires.  Everyday another fire and often, another death.  In Forestport, a booming logging town in the southern part of the Adirondacks where my great-grandfather plied his trade, the downtown area suffered two devastating fires in the period of seven years.

There was a wealth of other chaotic activities going on to stoke the fires under those who saw the end of the world at that time.  Nationally, there were anarchists setting off bombs.  Local skirmishes the world over.  Here, we had Black Hand societies that stemmed from Italian immigrants and were a precursor to the later Mafia.  They were notorious for their Black Hand letters sent to those from which they wanted to extort money, letters that usually had a drawing of a black hand and a dagger alongside their threat and demands.  Most of the threats were against other Italian immigrants. I was surprised to see multiple accounts of such letters being made public in the papers.

After a time of reading these papers and seeing page after page of relative misery, I could see why the contemporaries of that time would see the end of the world hurtling at them.  Made me appreciate our own times a bit more and put reports of our demise in perspective.

I guess Dickens was accurate for all eras when he wrote those great first lines of A Tale of Two Cities:    It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way- in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

So, the world may or may not end as the Mayans forecast.  If it does, it does.  I fit doesn’t, we’ll just feel like it is anyways…


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This painting, And Into The World  There Came a Soul Called Ida, is the work of the late Ivan Albright.  Not a household name by any means, but if you’ve seen his work you’ll definitely remember it.

I saw a large  retrospective of his work a number of years ago at the Met and was fascinated ( and a little creeped out) by his subjects and the darkness and tone of the work .  But it was the incredible textures of the paintings that I found amazing.  They were very sculptural on the surface, with deep moonscapes of color, layer after layer of paint that seemed to be shoved and mashed on to the surface.  It was unlike anything I had ever seen.  It was obviously the product of a huge amount of labor but it wasn’t labored.  There was something very beautiful there that transcended the unflattering depictions of the paintings.

Albright was best known for the painting he produced that was used in The Picture of Dorian Gray, the 1945  film version of Oscar Wilde’s famous novel of a corrupt young man who defies the ravages of time while his portrait reflects the true result of his debauched life.  It was the horrifying image at the end of the film.

I’m still fascinated by his work even though I have to admit I get a queasy feeling when I really take in the whole of his characters, like seeing a car wreck and not being to turn away. They are horrible and beautiful at once.  I now also really appreciate the epic efforts that must’ve went into creating these pieces, the hundreds of hours that must have been spent.  The patience of maintaining vision.

So check out the work of Ivan Albright.  He had great titles, as well.  You don’t have to like his work  but you should be aware of it…

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